I may be assassinated for writing this article. I’m about to reveal a secret to you, a secret that will change your life and how you look at personal development speakers forever.

Over the two years I’ve had the opportunity to dive a little deeper into the professional realm of speaking and writing. I’ve met some big names, heard a lot of stories, and have come to one remarkable conclusion: The biggest difference between the person in front of the room and everyone else is that the person in front of the room is more conscious of painting themselves in the best light externally and internally. They ignore their flaws and focus on their strengths.

“Here are the 7 principles of relationship mastery…also if anyone has a good divorce lawyer please pass their card up front”

As a leader and teacher you must provide a vision for others to work towards. No matter how tough the times are you put on your warrior face and lead the charge. As a teacher you can not express doubt in your material, or who will learn? Would you listen to a speaker that said “Here are the 7 principles of relationship mastery…also if anyone has a great divorce lawyer please pass their card up front?”

My point here isn’t to riot, ignore every speaker you see or search for the flaws in your heros; rather take them with a grain of salt and don’t be so hard on yourself. It is easy to meet someone who portrays themselves as perfect and then start to feel down on yourself. I only exercised 300 days last year, he was in the gym 384 days. Try writing your own over the top biography, highlighting only your strengths, and read it aloud in your best movie trailer voice each morning.

A perfect human, a perfect life, doesn’t actually exist. Heros inspire us by having ideals to strive towards, and this is the true journey. This is where their value really comes in. Perfection is impossible. Striving for perfection, knowing it can never be reached: This is my purpose.

So the next time you’re off to some big seminar take the men and women on stage as ideas of perfection you can work towards but never forget that when they walk off that stage they’re usually grabbing a coffee, hopping in a cab and staying in a Best Western. Except Tony Robbins, that guy is just crazy. Seriously, what’s in his Cheerios?

Whenever I get gloomy with the state of the world, I think about the arrivals gate at Heathrow Airport. General opinion’s starting to make out that we live in a world of hatred and greed, but I don’t see that. It seems to me that love is everywhere. Often, it’s not particularly dignified or newsworthy, but it’s always there – fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, husbands and wives, boyfriends, girlfriends, old friends. When the planes hit the Twin Towers, as far as I know, none of the phone calls from the people on board were messages of hate or revenge – they were all messages of love. If you look for it, I’ve got a sneaking suspicion… love actually is all around.

-Love Actually (2003)

You live in a city graced with a population of more than 2 million, where every day more men and women are turning 24-28-31–37, where more and more people are moving here, a city where every day new people become single.

Yet most people look at dating and relationships with scarcity. Scarcity is what makes people settle for less than they deserve: Less of a partner and less of a relationship. Finally, scarcity is the source of clinginess – a trait that many men and women cite as the number one turnoff.

If you’re reading this, you’re very likely one of the few that doesn’t feel that “all the good ones are gone” or that all you’re left with is an ocean of ineligible bachelors and bachelorettes. Instead, you take a deep breathe, and think about how many potential partners are dying to meet you and get to know you in this moment. Rather than sitting around moping and feeling sorry for yourself, or trying to get over an old relationship or a rejection, you realize that you can’t deny the two of you the pleasure of an incredible time.

When you come from a place of abundance, magic starts to happen. You’ll be surrounded by more friends and potential partners than you know what to do with and you’ll go into every interaction and relationship knowing that you’re coming from a place of choice.

We all know that light is needed to see the world. But what photo biologists and chronobiologists discovered a few years ago is that light is also needed to enjoy the world. Our bodies produce hormones on a 24-hour cycle called the biorhythm. This biorhythm is like a clock controlled by light exposure. In the morning as the natural light levels increase, the pineal gland is triggered and our body produces serotonin and dopamine – the hormones for alertness and joy. As the day winds down and light levels decrease, we produce melatonin – the hormone for sleep and healing. These hormones are produced like clockwork, and the sequences of this circadian clock are triggered by our exposure to different light levels.

Disruption of this cycle is due to either lack of light in the mornings or exposure to bright light late in the day. This can cause sluggishness and the blues. Over time this can have a drastic effect on your energy levels. Seasonal affect of circadian disruption shows up as SAD, seasonal affective disorder, which is merely a lack of sufficient light to trigger production of feel-good and feel-alert hormones. It is no surprise that SAD is prevalent in higher latitudes in winter months when natural daylight availability is at its lowest.

Both amount and colour of light needs to be appropriate for proper circadian function. Light, as we know by looking at the rainbow, consists of seven colours. Early in the day, we need bright, blue-rich light for optimal serotonin production. This could be daylight from the North Sky. Towards the end of the day, we need yellow-rich light of dimmer intensity. Exposure to bright, bluish light before bed time interferes with the melatonin production, and deep sleep.

So, if you work on a computer late at night, go with a background theme in shades of yellow or red, and lower the screen brightness. In the mornings, get outdoors and spend some time in daylight.
Light, the effective happiness drug is available to everyone, and like the best things in life, it’s free!

- Maninder Dhaliwal

How many of us are thinking “Hey I could do most of that!”? Really though, there is a reason I bring this story up and it certainly isn’t to promote Mcdonald’s. The Olympics are in town to celebrate the best in the world, people who have sacrificed it all to pursue their dreams and strive for excellence. These women and men are role models and icons, people we should look up to for inspiration and guidance. I just ask one thing: Do not forget they’re only people no different from you or me.

“Brad Pitt gets dandruff just like the rest of us, he just knows how to wear it”

I think we have created an almost caste system in our minds when it comes to celebrities, business leaders and top athletes. Why do we do this? Does separating what is being done by others from what we believe is possible for ourselves make it easier to criticize or to neglect our own dreams?  Let’s stop this right now. Brad Pitt gets dandruff when its freezing out just like the rest of us, he just knows how to wear it. No one is above or beneath you. Wait, pause, take that in. No one is above or beneath you.

When you place others above you it somehow makes it feel less wrong to gossip, criticize and tear into amazing individuals without regard for their feelings, lives or situations on the basis that they’re some superman celebrity. Critics, paparazzi and tabloids, please go die. It also creates imaginary roadblocks in your own mind as to what you are capable of and puts blinders up to the amount of work these individuals did to achieve greatness.

What’s my point here? Fantastic question. How would your own life, your dreams, goals and vision for the future if you viewed those who have achieved what you desire as equals, if you viewed everyone as equals? What if you grabbed breakfast with your business hero, had a quick lunch with your spiritual leader and finished the day with Dinner with your health guru? They’re all just people. Jump on it.

Next issue I will reveal a secret to you, a secret that will change your life and how you look at personal development speakers forever. Stay Tuned.

UPDATE: Catch part two of this article here.

-Dan Johnston

Ignite the flame in your lover’s eyes this Valentines day

This simple, sexy and fun recipe is perfect for those couples wanting to enhance their desire and delve deeper into a more sensual connection. So set aside a few moments and let’s turn up the heat on your relationship.

Ingredients:

• 2 people in love (or lust) with each other
• 1 – 2 candles
• 2 cushions for sitting
• 1 private, comfortable, preferably romantic space

1. Light the candles, dim the lights and (un)dress into something comfortable.
2. Using your cushions, sit comfortably on the floor facing each other.
3. Rest your hands; in your lap, on your thighs or even within the hands of your partner. Wherever puts your body at ease.
4. Begin to become aware of your breathing, not controlling your breath, but simply noticing each inhale and exhale.
5. As you breath, relaxed, bring your gaze to your partner, notice the shape of their face, the softness of their lips, the flush of their cheeks, and finally the depth of their eyes.
6. Continuing with a relaxed breath, allow yourself to sink into their eyes, letting go, as they become lost in yours.
7. Feel their presence, their emotion, their intensity, their lust, their passion. Allow yours to embrace them as you feed on theirs.
8. Enjoy. Let this exercise take you into whatever direction it may.
It’s a gateway into passion, sometimes intimately romantic and other times a simple celebration of our animalistic nature. Wherever it leads you, celebrate it.

Interested in learning more delicious ways to enliven the lust in your lives?  Check out Sagredo Life Systems upcoming Evolutionary Sexuality Series (available for singles and couples).  www.sagredolifesystems.com.

-  Alessandra Sagredo

Sagredo Life Systems
www.sagredolifesystems.com

Alessandra’s core focus is to help others unleash their life and begin living a life of bliss!  As an Intuitive Consultant, Spiritual Growth Facilitator and Meditation Teacher she works with an international client base, helping individuals and professionals go beyond the basics of living and start truly loving their life!

Salsa is based on the concept of leading and following, with the man leading and the woman following. I have found time and time again the man having uncertainty taking the lead. This puts the woman in the difficult position to back-lead instead of her following and truly experiencing the ride. In other words, men have forgotten what it means to be men, and women don’t feel like women anymore.

Having certainty in the lead doesn’t mean knowing all the steps – which can get boring very fast – rather it’s executing the next step with confidence. It’s knowing when to be gentle and when to be stronger.

“men have forgotten what it means to be men”

Following can be a scary feeling for a woman because it feels like giving up the illusion of control, a control she had to create because most men have no idea how to lead. This in turn, makes it hard for a man to lead. So then we’re getting nowhere in the dance or the relationship. When a woman gives up trying to back-lead she can go on an amazing adventure and unleash her feminine energy. This energy is powerful, beautiful, and captivating.

The final piece salsa teaches you is the art of connection. It starts with looking at your partner and evolves to paying attention visually and kinesthetically. When you pay attention to the dance, the relationship come to life and you can enjoy every little nuance.

If you want to master salsa, find a skilled instructor. If you want fast results and to learn in a way that’s fun, easy, and allows you to meet great people, come to the “Learn How To Dance In 1 Day” boot camp. It’s March 6th and is designed for those that have always wanted to try this beautiful dance but were worried they had two left feet, no rhythm, or no partner. Go to http://www.HowToSalsa.net for more details.

- Article by Cheyenne Kamran. Social Dynamics, Leadership, and Dating Expert Cheyenne Kamran has dedicated his life to creating and implementing strategies for men and women to lead extraordinary lives. He is co-founder of Lifestyle Transformations, a company specializing in empowering men to master their social and dating life as well as their relationships with women – from sky rocketing their confidence to giving them the know-how to have captivating conversations.

Cheyenne can be reached at cheyenne@lifestyletransformations.com, 1-800-261-1482 ext. 706 or visit www.LifestyleTransformations.com

Maybe you’ve experienced a state of mind where you’d do anything to achieve something that you wanted. You know that state of mind where you feel invincible and like you could completely conquer the world. Well imagine for a moment that you could achieve that state of mind everyday. This is the state of mind that you need to create an extraordinary life for yourself. Here is exactly how you cultivate this state of mind.

Secret Number One: Push Yourself Harder Then EVER Before!

People who achieve their dreams and live an extraordinary life do it by pushing themselves harder each and every day. They treat each day as a precious opportunity to excel and grow. One way to see if you’re pushing yourself as hard as you possible can is to measure your progress at the gym. If you don’t leave the gym each day feeling like you just put in the most effort you ever have, you are not cultivating the mindset needed to create an extraordinary life.

Secret Number Two: 10,000 Hours of Dedicated Work

In Malcolm Gladwell’s book Outliers he mentions that all “Outliers” (who are people achieving their dreams and living an extraordinary life) spend 10,000 hours focused on their area of passion. Find what you love doing and focus. If you’re not spending everyday doing what you love and developing skill sets that will help you become a top achiever in your industry – you aren’t in the top 5% of achievers and you won’t achieve that extraordinary life you’re seeking. Do the work 95% of people won’t do.

- William Oliver, is a law of attraction expert. He is an author, speaker and coach whose specialties include applying the law of attraction and helping others reach their full potential. William can be contacted at Info@GolfAttractors.com.

Standing at the top - Taft's Point

Instead of noticing how wonderful the flowers smell, or our food tastes, we tend to rush quickly through life forgetting to slow down and simply enjoy the moment.

When practiced, mindfulness can not only help us enjoy each daily moment, but also play a powerful role in the sexual areas of our lives. Its simple practice can amplify the passion, desire and ecstasy enjoyed. It increases our awareness of taste, touch, smell, and sound, making each moment a peak of enticement and excitement.

Increasing your sensuality and stepping into mindfulness…

To begin a practice of mindfulness try the following exercise, and remember: patience, enjoyment and relaxation.  Don’t rush, instead allow yourself to take the time to enjoy the experience.

Select a piece of wrapped food. In my classes I like to hand out a selection of candies or chocolates (traditionally we would use a grape or raisin).

It always amazes and amuses me that by the time I’m done distributing these sweet treats, most people have already devoured theirs. That’s when we begin – why did we feel the need to quickly, without much thought, devour that little morsel of sweetness?

Realizing that we hold 1 candy in our hand, why not take the time to really enjoy it? Taste it? We have been gifted with an amazing array of senses, and the ability to really enjoy the little (and big) things in life. Some thing as simple as a piece of wrapped chocolate, can be a wonderful experience.

After I’ve distributed the candies (and redistributed candies to those who’ve already devoured their initial treat), we begin the actual exercise of mindfulness meditation:

The idea is to relax, notice, taste, smell, touch, listen and enjoy that candy.  Taking our time, and remaining mindful of the experience, our feelings and body reactions, we dedicate 30 minutes to the simple and fulfilling exercise of eating a little candy.

1. Start with the wrapper – notice it, enjoy it, realizing that you will unwrap that candy, but for now you want to simply experience it.

2. As you slowly unwrap it, notice the smells, how it sounds as you open it. Is your body getting hungry for it? Enjoy the way the candy looks within the wrapper and without the wrapper.

3. Smell the candy and notice if your mouth begins to water, or your stomach growls. Enjoy the process.

4. Take a small taste, lick, nibble or bite it. Allow yourself to savor the sweetness.

5. Place the remaining candy in your mouth. Play with it, allow it to melt and really notice how it tastes. Take a moment to close your eyes and melt into the experience.

6. Relax with it.

Notice:

The wrapper?

Did you notice the designs on it? How did it sound as you unwrapped it? Did the wrapper entice you, give you ideas of what it may taste like?

The smell?

How did the candy smell before you even unwrapped it? Did the smell become even more enticing as you moved it closer to your mouth? How did your body react, did your mouth water?

The texture?

Did the candy have a smooth, firm texture? Or was it soft? When you placed it in your mouth did you notice how it felt against your tongue, and how it felt as it melted?

The Sound?

As you tore open that wrapper, how did it sound? Did it crinkle? As you held that candy in your mouth, did you notice the sounds it made as it moved around? Was it a hard candy that echoed as you knocked it against your teeth? Did it crunch when you bit into it?

The taste?

Was it delicious? Did it taste smooth and sweet? Was it what you expected, or perhaps it held a different flavour than you had thought? Did the taste change as it melted or as you crunched away on it?

This simple exercise can create world of difference in how your live your life. But be patient… A recent student said to me “this is tough, it’s painful to eat 1 candy in a 25 min time span, I thought I’d go nuts”.

She went on to explain that it wasn’t that she was hungry, but instead the idea that she had this candy in front of her, and with the experience intensifying how much she wanted to consume it, she began to get very impatient.

We as a society have become rushed, losing patience with ourselves, each other and life. Moving through at such a pace we often miss the little experiences that can bring joy to us. Or ignore the company that simply wishes to share love with us.

Rushing through the intimate areas of life is very common in western society. There of course is nothing wrong with quick and passionate intimacy, but when this becomes a way of life, we begin to miss out on an amazing connection with one another.

Now take that candy and replace it with the (wo)man in your life. Imagine what practicing mindfulness can do not only for every day living, but for your sexual side. Ask your partner to join you, and start with the candy. Soon enough you’ll be finding that the sweetness within that candy, is nothing compared to the deliciousness found within each other.

-  Alessandra Sagredo

Sagredo Life Systems
www.sagredolifesystems.com

Alessandra’s core focus is to help others unleash their life and begin living a life of bliss!  As an Intuitive Consultant, Spiritual Growth Facilitator and Meditation Teacher she works with an international client base, helping individuals and professionals go beyond the basics of living and start truly loving their life!

“Honey, do you love me?”

“What do you mean? Is it not obvious that I love you? I’m always cooking and cleaning for you! I always do nice things for you! You never do anything nice for me! How do I know if you even love me?”

“Of course I do! I always tell you how much I love your cooking and how beautiful you are. I tell you all the time how much I value everything about you.”

Does this sound all too familiar to you? This situation completely described my parents about year ago. I knew they loved each other, but why was it not coming across that way?

Their different ways of expressing love led to many arguments and miscommunications because they could never understand each other. Some days they felt like love had gone astray because they just couldn’t get along.

One day I picked up the New York Times Bestseller The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman who flawlessly describes that we all have a primary love language that speaks immensely to our soul. There are five love languages in total: Words of Affirmations, Quality Time, Receiving Gifts, Acts of Service and Physical Touch. Generally, the way we express our love is the way we understand it, and when two people express their love differently it can lead to confusion or even heartache.

After reading this book I realized that my mother, a very nurturing type, showed her love through Acts of Services, meaning she expressed her love for my father by taking care of him through household chores. My father on the other hand showed his love through Words of Affirmations by verbally expressing words of appreciation and encouragement.

When I shared this with them their faces lit up! If my father could do a really nice act of service for my mother such as cleaning up the garden, and my mother could praise him with compliments of what a good job he did, they would both feel so appreciated and loved because they spoke each other’s language. They realized that their love was definitely still there but they were just expressing it in a way the other couldn’t understand.

So if you ever find yourself in a situation where you don’t know how your partner feels, just remember we all express our love in different ways. Maybe have a discussion with him/her about these five love languages and your relationship could change for the better!

Check out a description of Gary Chapman’s Five Love Languages. Which one speaks to you the most?

- Pia Edberg, a social psychology expert currently working for SAP Canada in human resources and as their Global Diversity Champion.

About a year ago it occurred to me I had misplaced this child-likeness in my own life. Standing inside this realization I was at a crossroads. I could operate like I always had and live a familiar life producing marginal results or I could try on a new perspective and potentially create a life beyond what I thought was possible. What had me choose the unfamiliar path was a powerful conversation with my coach. He said “Honestly what is the worst possible scenario? The worst possible outcome is nothing changes and you continue on the same way you always have.” Brilliant. It was this moment the world as I knew it shifted. The big game was now my life. The rules: child-like enthusiasm, awe and excitement.

I’m most successful at the game “My Life” when I’m present to the nature of my thoughts. I choose to view my world through the lens of excitement, adventure, love, and discovery. My interactions reflect a light, playful freedom. I express myself freely and have the capacity to supercharge my creativity without restraint or concern.

I make myself present to the beauty and greatness in my world each day to keep me in the game. Most importantly I share my discoveries with the people in my life. What I’m grateful for today is opportunity. An opportunity to express who I am within a community of amazing inspiring beings, who like me are committed to each person’s capacity for greatness. Shift your thoughts and your world will follow.

- Kelsey Grant, a sought after personal development and relationship coach, musician and choreographer. She can be reached at kelsey@allincoaching.com, 778-834-7571, or www.allincoaching.com

“But what do I say?”
“What if I run out of things to say?”

These are the two of the most common questions I’ve faced while coaching people on having effective and captivating personal and business relationships. Thus, it wasn’t a surprise when the number one thing requested at our last Elated News writer’s meeting was an article answering the aforementioned questions.

Now I can give you a lot of cool and interesting scripts, but I won’t. Instead, I’ll reveal two fundamental ideas to make every single one of your interactions naturally interesting and memorable.

Offering Value

Whether it’s a business meeting or approaching an attractive person at a bar, most people have the mindset of “I want to get his business” or “I want to get her number”. The person they are dealing with can feel that from the moment they open their mouth. That is taking value.

What if their mindset going into the meeting was “I want to contribute to him” or “I want to make her smile”? When we let go of our agenda, and come from a place of genuinely offering value first, we not only stand out from everyone else, but we have unlocked doors in business and personal relationships that others have to work a lot harder to open.

Creating The Essence

When you are with your friends you never wonder what to say next or how to impress them. The reason you and most people don’t is because it is understood that you are close friends. The underlying meaning of the interaction – the essence – is one of having fun and going with the flow.

When we are around our bosses, potential customers or attractive dates, a shift occurs. We focus on how to impress and what to say next – an essence, or way of being, which is not useful.

The essence you want to create on a date varies from being playful to connecting intimately. Your focus is on “we’re having an awesome time” and “I want to open up and get to know you.” This allows you to relax, flirt, and really get to know the other person.

The essence you want to create in business meeting is contributing to a common goal and connecting professionally. The mindset is “working together will create a lot of good for our customers and us“ and “we’re establishing trust and professional rapport.” With this mindset you’re guaranteed to have a productive meeting.

I’m about to share with you a foolproof method to completely shift your identity. A method so powerful you can completely transform any aspect of your life. Before I do, ask yourself, what change do I want to make in my own life? What change must I make? Before reading any further, write down the change you’re committed to making in your life. No paper? Write it here:

Commit to Being A Person Of Integrity

In order to make any change you must be an individual of integrity. How do you do this? Start by commit to it right now. From this point forward you are somebody who honours their word. Start small with promises you know you’ll be able to complete and avoid agreeing to anything you aren’t sure you’ll be able to live up to. Once this becomes a habit, expand to making larger promises and keeping them. Once you build this muscle it becomes very difficult and painful to break your word, even to yourself.

Set Big, Public Goals

When you publicly share a goal it builds momentum, makes it clear that you are serious about succeeding and spreads the word so you do not need to re explain yourself constantly.

Be Consistent & Show You Are Serious

If on Tuesday you’re never drinking again, on Thursday you’re on a diet and on Friday you’re having Wine & Lobster people will not take you seriously. When you make a decision to change people like to test your conviction before accepting it: Survive the first month and you start to inspire change in others and build momentum.

Notice Your Language and Be Dramatic

Eliminate “trying”, “right now”, “started” and all other softeners from your vocabulary immediately. Someone who has started trying to eat better has a better chance of winning American Idol than eating healthy. There is no room for error here: You pass or fail this class. You are healthy. You don’t smoke. You love public speaking. Get the idea? Never be afraid to offend and always use firm answers; “No thank you, I value my health.” You won’t be offered cheesecake again.

So often we feel trapped in our identities. How others perceive us really is a self-fulfilling prophecy. This can be as destructive or powerful as you make it. Create an empowering identity and those around you will reinforce it. Initially change will be difficult but if you are strong and follow my advice you can create massive, lasting change starting today.

Ready to make the first step and commit to making a change? Start being accountable today: Post your goal in the comments section.

The reality is; I don’t care about “Reality TV”. I believe individuals can (and should) create their OWN reality. The inconvenient truth is we are surrounded by mass media marketing telling us what to do, how to act and what to buy. No wonder many of us feel overwhelmed.

I have a simple question & suggestion for you: How do you want to FEEL each day?
FEELING A: Worried, stressed, paranoid, overwhelmed and fearful? Or….
FEELING B: Happy, empowered, connected with your community, confident about achieving your personal and financial goals?

If you chose Plan A, no worries, keep watching and reading the same negative programming and publications & keep thinking what you’ve always been told to think.

If you chose Plan B, COOL! Welcome to our Elated Inner Circle Community. Get to know us (and read us), we look forward to getting to know you too.

Einstein defined insanity as “doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result”. If you want a different result or feeling than you are currently accustomed to, start taking different actions and thinking in a more productive and positive way. Start surrounding yourself with positive people, personal development programs that make you feel, well, more elated. Make sense? Good.

I personally Challenge you to take 90 days off all the negative influences in your life: no mass media, brain numbing TV, negative newspapers, and stop listening to “Greg” in accounting who is convinced the world will end in 2012. Take a vacation from your spouse if they are negative. Seriously. Unplug from all negative distractions that hinder your highest personal potential. You’ll be AMAZED at how much extra time, energy, creativity & resources you will manifest! Treat yourself to a good book & consider going on a retreat or vacation. Why? Why not? You deserve it, don’t you?

Enjoy your new found silence, solitude & serenity and SMILE Vancouver, it’s addictive.

For Some Of Us Financial Success Is German Cars & Swiss Watches. For Others It Is Having Enough Passive Income To Enjoy The Beach or Countryside Undisturbed.

Surprisingly, most of us chronically overlook our most valuable asset, which is our own self! So how do you invest in yourself? The first often ignored step is taking the time to figure out what your ideal life looks like, financially, occupationally and otherwise, so that you can design your investing, and your finances in general, to complement both your long-term and short-term objectives.  Once you know what you really want, you are now in a much better position to create a financial blueprint by design rather than one by default. In other words, you’ll know what you’re doing and why. That can make all the difference in the world!

There are many different ways to invest in one’s self. A lot of people get stuck in investing ruts. They think that investing means mutual funds, or purchasing “hot” stocks. But there are many legitimate traditional and nontraditional ways to invest. Different investment vehicles can be smart ways to invest, depending on where you’re at in life, and what objectives you have. Every investment vehicle has its positives and negatives, but the point is that there is more than one way to invest, and many overlook one of the most obvious investment opportunities: Developing your own capacity to create real value in the world, which in turn leads to financial prosperity.

It is not so much that investment products are good or bad, it is whether they meet the objective or not. What you want is a plan that is not based on limits, but on the limitless possibilities of your own unique potential.

-Garrett Gunderson

There are two things all the aforementioned ‘advice’ has in common: First, it provides the illusion of a quick-fix to attracting the opposite sex and second, it encourages you to do attraction rather than to be attractive.

What that really means to you is that you’re moving away from being yourself. You’re putting on an elaborate show; dating and relationships become a complicated game with you constantly worrying about the next move.

And believe me, I’ve been there. From the pickup lines to the interesting style choices (black nails and fur hat anyone?), I was the master of doing. My biggest feat must have been trying to get the girl during class with an acapella rendition of Earth Angel. I did a phenomenal job, the class erupted in applause, and she still wanted to be “just friends”. And my journey began.

My journey to discover the difference that makes the difference. Hundreds of books and seminars and thousands of interactions later, here it is: Be comfortable with yourself. If you’re comfortable and confident in who you already are – with all your kinks and all – you will be amazed at the quality of people drawn to you. Start today, be grateful about all that you are, and allow yourself to evolve beyond the narrow-minded “doing” mentality.

Photo by Friska Bako

-Cheyenne Kamran